Letter to Simmons

So I guess you could say that in our minds, Bill Simmons is a sportswriter's God. Or just a God without even bringing sportswriting into the mix. Just like a dog who tries to please its master only to be ignored, I sent what is surely the first of many duly ignored emails to Simmons. It's about Roger. And it goes like this:

Roger Clemens is back in baseball (again) and his biggest fan is excited to see him. That biggest fan is Roger himself. You and I share a hatred for this man. I mean, all he had to do was mention us, the fans, once when he left but no, Roger showed his true colors. He has one allegiance: his wallet. Is Roger returning to the Yankees for the fans? Is he going back because that's where he won his rings? Of course not. Roger is going back because the Yankees are a bottomless pit of cash and they're allowing him to come and go as he pleases. He doesn't have to be there on his off days. He doesn't even have to be in the same state as the rest of the team as long as he shows up every fifth day to pitch. Some say that he does this because he's a family man. So what does that make every other baseball player without the same luxury? Is it a league filled with dead-beat dads? No, of course it isn't. Because of his stature Roger may be able to secure a contract that allows him to be a better father, but now he's a dead-beat teammate. I can't imagine playing with a guy who decides he's so good that he doesn't have to show up in February, drive across Florida on a bus for a month, and then spend the better part of the next six months away from his family. Roger Clemens is the greatest pitcher who ever lived, and as a Sox fan I am so proud of what he did for us. But now I kind of feel like the kid who grows up thinking his dad is a hero only to find out he's cheated on my mom, been dealing drugs to make money, and now he's married the neighbor and treats her son better than he ever treated me. Bitter much? Yeah, but I'm a Sox fan. Not that Roger would understand anything about that.

I'd try changing the font, but that would be difficult. It's late. Go to bed. And stop talking to yourself.